Whew...what a day...

Hey all :)
So yesterday was definately a one-of-a-kind day.

All four of us kids led worship for the Sunday School opening. Abby sang/spoke, Danny (yes my brother) played the guitar/sang, Jen played the guitar/sang and I played the piano/sang. It was SO AWESOME to do something like that with my siblings! God has really been doing a work in all of us!!! HE is so GOOD!

So everything was going pretty good until about 10 minutes before Dad finished the sermon. My right arm went completely numb and I lost all the strength in it. I sat there shaking it, trying to get some feeling back into it because I had to play the last hymn on the piano. Well. The numbness did not go away. In fact, I got up to the piano and not only was it numb but I could not even press down the piano keys because I had no strength in my fingers. That kind of freaked me out. I mean, I have had numbness for 4 months but NOTHING like that.

So I went home and tried to sleep. I felt very lethargic and just...exhausted...the problem was that the numbness/weakness spread from my right arm to my left. By the time I woke up my arms and legs were completely numb and I had no strength in them. They felt like dead weights on my body.

I tried not to be worried about it and just went on with my day. I watched a movie and then went downstairs, sat on the couch and had a wonderful in depth talk with Danny (which was SUCH a blessing in itself). Everyone else had gone to a birthday party so when they got home it was almost time for our evening service. Danny, Jen, and I wanted to lead the worship so we headed over to the office to get some songs together.

The whole time I was feeling stranger and stranger until finally (when I could barely get up from dad's chair) Dad sent me home.

I came in. Sat down on the couch. Started talking to mom. Then all the sudden I was having a very hard time breathing. It kept getting worse and worse until I was dragging air in and when I did it made this horrible rasping noise. I wasn't too worried about it at first (I figured it would just wear 0ff) and so I told Mom I would just rest, stay home from church and then I would be fine. All this started happening at about 5:20.

So, Mom left for church and I went upstairs and started to watch a movie but then went into Danny's room to keep him company. I was trying to instill words of sisterly wisdom but I was finding it harder and harder to get the words out plus the rasping was getting worse and worse.

We have an RN that attends our church but she normally doesn't come on Sunday nights. I remember wishing that she could come though just because it had been about an hour and I was starting to really not feel so good.

Well what would you know? As I was talking (well attempting to) to Danny Mom brought her up! She had come to church that night! Which was really a good thing because she took one look at me and after listening to me breath said that I needed to go right away to the city hospital (which is about and hour away from us).

Dad was still at church however, so they got me downstairs and on the couch where she monitered my breathing for the next hour. By this time I was so out of it and just unable to talk or really move. All I could do was focus on my breathing.

The awesome part was that I was so calm. God gave me that peace that passes understanding and I could just sense Him right there besides me. I just cannot explain what a comfort that was.

So finally the church service ended and Dad came over. A ton of people where there but I was kind of in this fog...I remember but I just could not...hard to explain. Anywho, so they got me in the van along with Mom, Dad, and Danny and we set off on our way with Grandpa Kelley following in his car.

As we pulled out of the driveway I saw all these people standing there watching us go and Mom was telling me: "The whole church is praying." It was such a comfort to know that...then I found out that the church where we go to youth group was praying as well, as well as tons of people on facebook. Let me tell you. Knowing that they were praying was something I clung to that ride to the hospital!

So, we finally got to the hospital. I was admitted into the Pediatrics ER.
After going through Triage (I think that is how you spell it...) They put me right into a room (I was surprised how fast I got in but not really because of all the prayers people where praying) and started hooking me up to all sorts of machines and monitors. Then they started me on a nebulizor (spelling again?) treatment which right away helped my throat not constrict so much. Slowly, my breathing started to get more regular and I was able to talk well for the 1st time in about 3 1/2 hours! Grandpa Kelley got me laughing by telling me that the reflections on the mask made me look like I had Bugs Bunny teeth! I was so happy He was there! I love my Grandpa...

So after the nebulizar (spelling again?) treatment was over they put me back on the oxygen. After the doctor examined me they sent me up to x-ray. When that was done it was back to the room once more to wait and see what was going on. The doctor came back and said that theyhad not been able to find anything wrong on the x-rays. Once again they were stumped and while they knew something was definately wrong-they had no idea what is was. The best thing they said to do was to get things figured out with my neurologist as soon as possible. That was definately a little bit disheartening. I was feeling a lot better then when I had come in but knowing that there is probably something serious wrong but no one knows what...that can get a little bit tough. The things is though that I knew (and know) that I had a choice to make. I could be bitter, worry, and second guess God OR I could continue to trust that HE knows what is best when it comes to me. After all He now only knows my life story-HE WROTE IT! Well suffice to say, I chose the latter: to trust my God and to completely rely on HIM for the outcome. On the way to the hospital I remember Danny reading me these verses:
"Truly my soul silently waits for God;
From Him comes my salvation. He only is my rock and my salvation;
He is my defense;
I shall not be greatly moved." (Psalm 62:1-2) As I was lying there waiting for the treatment I had gotten to wear off so I could go home the Lord brought back to my mind something that had happened in the car on my way to the hospital. I was looking out the window and it was as though the Lord just put this thought into my head as I was struggling to breath: "Jesus couldn't breath on the cross either." WHOA! Talk about putting things into perspective. As I sat there struggling to breath I was just overwhelmed with gratitude and appreciation for the fact the my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ had CHOSEN to not be able to breath FOR ME. He chose to die a cruel and excruciatingly painful death FOR ME. Why? Because He loved me...It was such an eye opener to me personally. It was as though the Lord showed me something so precious through not being able to breath! Who would have thought that possible!?!?

So yes, diagnosis: They know something is wrong with me but they are not sure what.
Steps to take: I am going to another appointment tomorrow for my back and then the MRI's and 3 hour test on April 10th and then follow-up with the neurologist. How am I doing: the numbness and the tingling never goes away. I am also quite weak (though nothing like yesterday) and there is a tightness in my chest that makes it a little more work to breath (but again nothing like yesterday) but other than that I am feeling pretty good. Not 100% yet but it just takes time. In the meantime: Continue to grow in my love for my family, friends and most importantly my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

Blessings to you all :)